Just lean into the light
by weeziewoo
Summary: Jeremy and Christine are together and again, Jeremy begins ignoring Michael. Michael starts falling, falling further then he did when Jeremy was SQUIPed. He stops talking to the SQUIP squad, and only one of them asks why. In which Michael finds an unlikely solace in Rich. Tooth rotting fluff and 420 blaze it. Tw: Depression, Panic attacks, anxious Michael, self loathing.


**Oh God! Another musical fanfic by WeezieWoo! Who'd of guessed. What is this one like my fifth? Also title based off of the calling by the killers. Cross-posted on AO3 under the same name.**

Michael's POV~~

 _I hated seeing them together. I hate that he began ignoring me again. I hate that I'm always second priority to him._

I stare at them from across the lunch table. The two of them are basically eating each other's faces. I grumble under my breath and Rich turns to me.

"You okay man?" He whispered in my direction. I nodded.

"Just peachy." I whispered back. The bell rung, signifying the end of lunch. Christine and Jeremy walked out holding hands, still not paying attention to me. I saw Jeremy speaking to Dustin on the way out.

So, they weren't so enthralled with each other that they couldn't talk to other kids. Just me. Great. I stood up and headed into the hallway linked to the cafeteria. I didn't walk to class, I opened the restroom door and slid into one of the stalls. I slouched back against the door.

 _You aren't good enough for him. You're so useless. Just die already._

The voices in my head assaulted me mercilessly. My breathing picks up and I thought I was going to pass out.

 _He doesn't like you because you're to fat. He doesn't like you because you're a homo._

Another voice chips in.

"No. It's not true." I whisper. I drop down onto the floor. My body shaking, tears dripping from my eyes.

Someone knocks on the stall door.

"Michael, let me in." The voice says softly. It's Rich's voice unmistakably.

I reach up weakly and push the sliding lock open.

"Oh Jeez. Uhm, listen to me Michael." He says quietly.

"Deep breaths. In for 5, hold for 6, out for 7." Rich instructs me.

He keeps repeating those words until my breathing evens out. His hand is hovering by mine.

"Am I allowed to touch you?" He asks calmly. I nod and he grabs my hand. He pulls me up from the floor.

"Do you wanna go back to class?" He asks, I shake my head.

He leads me towards a back door into school that no one ever uses. We sit down on the floor, whilst leaning against the wall.

"You smoke?" He asks taking a small plastic container out of his bag. He opens it and reveals it's full of weed. I nod slowly. He rolls up a roach from cardboard and proceeds to roll a spliff. We pass it between the two of us.

"So- uhm, what happened back there?" Rich asks after ten minutes, his voice barely above a whisper.

"I don't really wanna talk about it." I sigh.

"It's about those two isn't it." He questions, taking another drag.

"Yeah." I nod again. Rich hands me the spliff. A trainee teacher appears out the door to our left holding a straight, he leans against the wall.

"Doesn't this school have a no smoking on site rule?" The teacher asks. I nod.

"We won't tell if you don't." Rich grins.

"Sounds fair." The teacher smirks, whilst lighting up his cigarette. I take a puff of the spliff and hand it back to Rich. The teacher finishes his cigarette and steps on the end. He disappears back indoors. I hear the bell ring signifying the end of the day.

"Wanna head back to mine?" Rich asks and I breathe a sigh of relief.

"Yeah, as much of the time I spend getting stoned in my basement, if my mom's- I mean mom. Knew I had been smoking at school they'd -I mean she'd kill me." I internally face palmed at my fuck up.

"Wait, dude you have two mom's?" He asks.

 _Oh, good going, now rich thinks you're weird too._

"That's super awesome! Except for the endless cycle of Go ask your mother." He rambled. I laughed.

"Dude, you have no idea how annoying that is." I grinned.

"You have a car, right? I caught a lift with Jake this morning, my car's in the garage right now." Rich admitted.

"Yeah, be warned it's a shitty PT cruiser." I laughed whilst heading back towards the car park. I unlocked my car and Rich dropped into the passenger side. He told me where he lived and I drove over there. As soon as the car stopped he hopped out. I climbed out and locked the car.

"Welcome to Casa De Rich." He smiled, whilst dragging me towards the front door.

I sent a quick text to one of my mum's.

'Won't be home until later, I'm at a friend's house.'

This was going to be an interesting afternoon…


End file.
